What a stark word that is... third. The first year was bemusing and focused on carrying on. The second year knocked the stuffing out of us and really was about coping and figuring out who we were without him. This third year has been cruel in its undeniable reality... and yet consoling in showing us our life does continue, and it is good. Life is good. It has been altered in a way I never would have chosen, and yet I can't overlook the fact that it is good.
I miss him every day, but I'm not sad every day. I am crying right now because I was writing a card for my mom, who will shortly be returning home from her Christmas visit here in Sohoe. That's when the realization hit: three; third; real. I'm going to allow myself to feel sad today, but then it's time to get on with it again. I want to have wonderful things to tell him when I see him again.
I know there are others who have lost loved ones recently. It's not easy, especially at this time of year. My heart goes out to you.
A previous post about grief
Tess...it will be 33 years since my own father passed away. That day still remains as a photograph in my mind. It's as if it happened yesterday. That will never change, but the sadness does fade over time though it will never really disappear. I don't want it to disappear so it will remind me how good God was and is to me, in having given me such a father. I now have my own personal saint in heaven praying for me and my own family. And yes...I can't wait to be reunited with him again. God bless you friend.
ReplyDeletePraying for you and the family (as always) always, and at this time of year especially.
ReplyDeleteOn this feast of the Holy Family, keeping you and yours in my prayers.
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