The Lighthouse

the lighthouse

18 September 2012

3 randoms and a serious

Hello dear reader,

Today will bring a series of random thoughts, mostly to let you know I'm still here, though mostly unable to post, due to this very frustrating "You have logged out from another location" situation.  Oddly enough Blogger works randomly and occasionally - usually when I'm unprepared and have nothing to say.  If anyone else has experienced this, or know how to correct it, I'd appreciate hearing from you!

Random thought # 1
I got my hair cut last week.  It is a good cut and I am happy with it.  I did, however, get sucked into buying a bottle of very expensive post-shampoo product that promises miraculously smooth hair that also cuts drying time by 20%.  We'll see about that. However, even if it ends up being a bunch of hooey, the haircut itself was worth it.

Random thought # 2
Roasting anything makes it taste better.  Last night I had cauliflower for supper.  I don't like cauliflower, but I roasted the whole head (chopped into bits) with many cloves of garlic and about half an onion for about 40 min, then pureed the whole lot of it.  It was fantastically delicious.  I might be a cauliflower convert.

Random thought #3
It is very flattering that the public believe their friendly neighbourhood librarian knows all things, but I'm telling you folks, we don't.  My particular weak link is technology.  I tremble when someone asks me about their ereader, and feel inadequate when they need help with their email account. I run the other way when assistance is required in the local history room and I'm expected to set up the microfilm machine.  I wasn't always this entrenched in Ludditism, and I'm not sure when or why it began, but it seems a hopeless case now.  If this is a case of sink or swim, I'm afraid I'm going down.  Donations of floaties or lifevests would be gratefully accepted.  Please email the author for forwarding address.

And now for something serious:
Random thought #4
It must be a few weeks ago now (that's how long its been since I've been able to post here), the Gospel reading (I think from Luke) was of Jesus asking Peter to cast his net "into the deep", to which Peter assured Jesus that they had been fishing all night, with little success.  Jesus insists, and so Peter does.  We know, of course, the result: a catch so plentiful they couldn't haul the nets back into the boat.  Peter responds by pleading with Jesus to leave him, because he was a sinful man.  How does Jesus react?  Not with anger or disappointment, but by telling Peter to not be afraid.  How wonderful!!  Assurance from Our Lord Himself that we need not fear Him.
I need that reminder now and then, because I talk myself into believing I'm a wretch and God couldn't possibly love me.  And yes, it's true that I'm not perfect (I heard a gasp from the audience) and I must rely on Grace to get through each day, and God's mercy to end my days with Him, but it is just as true that God created me to be me.  He sees the depths of me - yes the wretchedness which I cannot deny - but also the wonderfulness which I often cannot bring myself to acknowledge.
The point I took from Luke's reading that day was: we need not hide our sinfulness from God.  We need not ask Him, like Peter did, to depart from us. He knows we have a tendency to question, doubt, struggle, fall...and He still loves us, and still asks more from us, like Peter, who so often got it wrong in his time with Jesus, and still was made a fisher of men.


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  2. On the "You have logged out from another location" - I get that sometimes, too. Some people recommend clearng the browser cache, but that has never made a difference for me. I think I get it because I log into GMAIL from my phone (it logs in and checks every hour) using that account, so there may be some conflict. But then again, it might not happen for months, and then it will start up again. In a nutshell, I don't know...

    on Random Thought #1 - can't help here... I usually look like Lyle Lovett having a bad hair day.

    on Random Thought #2 - I like cauliflower, but it's an acquired taste. Onion can't hurt.

    on Random Thought #3 - I've worked in electronics and computers for almost 35 years, and I don't know everything. There's just too many things to know. Don't feel badly about it. Transforming into a Luddite is just your brain's way of coping with an uncomfortable situation. You obviously haven't screwed up enough or people wouldn't keep asking you for help. It's something you'll have to work on.

    on Random Thought #4 - If you're the depth of wretchedness, the rest of us have some serious issues. And no, don't be afraid. You'll have to trust me on that one.

  3. I can so relate with you are saying and feeling Tess. I usually sit in the second pew at Mass because first is reserved for the lector and his family. But, there are some Sundays that upon entering the Church, after having an insufferable week in the world, that I cannot approach the alter any closer than the last pew in the back of the church. Like Peter I want to tell Jesus, "Leave me!". Since my presence at Mass is required, I cannot leave on my own, so I sit in the last pew by myself unable to come closer to Him.

    I don't think that thinking ourselves wretched at times is such a bad thing as long as we don't go overboard. I think it keeps our pride in check and it keeps ourselves from thinking that we are hunky dory in our spiritual life, thus fooling ourselves.

    I have little patience with my sinfulness, wanting to be perfect so I can stop being (what I feel at times) a disappointment to Him. I am what I am and WHO I am and there is nothing I can do about that except accept His grace and work with it and become the person He called me to be. Wretchedness has it's place in our lives. We just can't let it overwhelm our life. Peace sister.

  4. Sarah - amen in three-part harmony.

    Avery, thanks for the commiseration and consolation. It is greatly appreciated.

    Bobster, I get it. The back pew is not a bad place to be, as long as we don't close ourselves to mercy and grace, right? We continually go higher up and further in (to borrow an idea from the marvellous CS Lewis).

  5. Hello Tess,

    Lovely blog, and I totally understand the computer technical issues (I get those regularly). It is really wonderful that you work in a library. I volunteer in one because I enjoy working with books (not computers:)). My only problem, I like to read them too:).
    God bless, and have a wonderful day.


  6. When I read that passage I feel relief and a sense of calmness and quietude. If wasn't Jesus who would be my redeemer and Savior? Without Jesus my life wouldn't have meaning, I would be no more than a miserable and blind man. I only regret having founding Him at a relatively late stage of my walk.

  7. I forgot to sign up the post, sorry.


  8. Thank you Frances. Hooray for volunteering in your library! Are you learning the Dewey Decimal System? It does make sense, doesn't it?

    Luis, God has been gracious to us, hasn't He? I understand your regret in coming to the Lord so late, but really, it is better late than never at all! Remember the vineyard worker who started at the end of the day: his reward was the same as that of those who had toiled all day.