Slumbering

When it is all over you will not regret having suffered; rather you will regret having suffered so little, and suffered that little so badly.
-- St. Sebastian Valfre
When I read this quotation from good St. Sebastian, I tried to imagine myself regretting not having suffered more. My life is fairly easy: I have health, employment, family, a sound mind...and yet there is struggle and hardship which I am usually trying to avoid. I know people who really do suffer, through the loss of loved ones, physical challenges, chronic financial shortfalls, deeply unhappy marriages, and so on. I have wondered how they persevere, and I have been asked by them what it means, or why it is permitted, that there should be pain and suffering in the world. I offer here only a few thoughts.

St. Sebastian's are words for sober reflection. It is often hard, in the course of everyday ordinary life, to have an eternal perspective. We can get stuck in a rut of survival, of trying to 'just get by'. When today is the same as yesterday, and yesterday was no jubilee, where's the inspiration to look up, spiritually and physically?

Monotony and tedium are soporific, as is (unfortunately) level ease. They cause the spirit, the mind, and the heart to drift into sleep, to no longer be aware of Beauty or Truth. To experience suffering is like being poked with a stick: it wakes us up, focuses our attention, sharpens our vision. When there is trouble or strife, our instinct is to reach for help; the cry of our heart is a child's cry for its parent. For a soul disposed to perceive Truth, life's difficulties are opportunities to become acquainted with the mercy of God.

I walked to work a few days ago, after a heavy snowfall and in frigid temperatures. The few people I passed were as bundled up as I was, and as we trekked through unbroken snow we shared a smile of acknowledgement: we had survived it, and there we were, getting on with things...wasn't it great? We have months of this challenge ahead, and when it's over and the sun shines warmly and the earth turns green once again, our spirits will exult and we will delight in the new beauty we see around us. So, being shaken by trials can help us grow in strength and learn to appreciate the blessings more evident in calmer times of life.



This is not something to be taken lightly: being awake is important. A soul has to be alert in order to perceive God, to recognize the dignity in each person, and to fully realize its own potential. Suffering doesn't suddenly become easier with this knowledge, but it can be a comfort to know that it isn't without purpose.